Serving When Sad-The Blue Teapot

Sad Teapot by Neiil Oswald.
 https://flic.kr/p/8scaVu

If you read many of my posts, or know me, you know that I am a professed victim of depression. I suffer from a mental illness that is as real as any physical disease. Anything or nothing can signal the black clouds to gather and darken overhead. And if something difficult happens while I'm under that black cloud, it is easy to allow it to surround me and choke out all light and joy. However, over the years, the Lord allowed me to learn the signs of the approaching gloom, and He sends comfort at just the right time to keep me from disappearing into that black, cold cloud.

That's not to say I don't have my bout of tears, sighs, and general mopiness. Believe me. Ask my family, my dog, my close friends, my therapist, my doctor. I get to a place where chocolate seems to be the only good thing in life, and I have none and I don't feel strong enough to get in the car and go get it. It can get bad. Real bad. And this short, stout little teapot of a woman can get very, very blue.

The most astounding thing about what the Lord has done for me in all of this? Even in my darkest blue state, when someone calls me for help, the clouds grow lighter, the blues fade, and I find myself being able to give that person sound advice that can come only from the leading of the Holy Spirit. This unworthy vessel can serve even when suffering because I have made it available for the Master's use. That's just wild. Really. Think about it. All I have to do is what I was made to do, be a vessel to His glory.

Am I always ready for use? Nope. I'm flawed. Sometimes, I do let the clouds choke me and fill me up with dread, shame and hopelessness. That's when depression easily leads to sin. Satan delights in tricking God's children, and he will use any weakness he can to pull us from the delight of God's presence. And since he is second in power only to God, he can do a very thorough job of it. Don't doubt that. He is evil, but he is very talented and creative.

So what to do? As I said earlier, I have learned the warning signs, some of which are particular to me, and when I heed them I do better. When I am hit with something particularly difficult? I understand that it's natural to be sad, and down, and understand it will pass as it has in the past. But I also know that I need to tell someone, and admit I'm struggling. There is no shame in asking for help. In fact, especially for those of us recovering from the "Big F Fundamentalism" mindset, it shows great bravery. We ask for help when we have the flu, don't we? If we ignore the symptoms of flu and carry on as normal, we may injure ourselves to the point of dying, all while infecting and hurting everyone we contact. The same potential is there when we suffer with depression and don't recognize its power to harm us and those around us.

If you think you may possibly suffer from depression, reach out for help. This link: Signs of Clinical Depression, sends you to WebMD's site and has a great deal of good information about the medical side of depression.

Serving when sad? It's possible as long as we listen to the leading of the Spirit, and realize that depression is an illness and process that we must recognize and handle with care in ourselves in others. 

Praising Him under the clouds and waiting for the sun,
Teapotjan

Facing Fears

Back at the end of June, and before the startling month of July, I wrote about the fear involved in leaving the familiar ways of Fundamentalism. As God often does, He used several circumstances to teach me more. As I do, I delved into a bit of depression, and doubt. July has been a long, hard month for one reason or another, but it has been a month of learning, change, crying, laughing, doubt, and assurance.

Since leaving my last job, I've encountered more extreme ups and downs on my emotional roller coaster than normal. The lack of my own personal income limits my monetary ability to give to foreign missions, but that lack also helps me find new ways to contribute. The lack of a scheduled job distracts me from achieving goals, but gives me the time needed when I am focused. And the lack of needed room in my home frustrates me, even while those causing it are precious to me. I have the opportunity to reach for a dream, but I have many obstacles to overcome before reaching it. And of course, during these ups and downs, that old feeling of fear and the longing for the familiar crept up on me at the worst of times. 

One of those fears? Confronting those for whom I feel responsible. Truly, I hate confrontation, but I often find myself needing to initiate it. The biggest problem with that? I can no longer fall back on the pat phrases and teachings of my earlier church days. "Because I said so" and "Because that's the ways it's always been," and "because that's what Dr.Nowayjose said" no longer cuts it. After thinking on my own, and having my mind opened by the Holy Spirit, I must seek out the true, biblical reason that supports my objection to an issue. Self-doubt rears up, but, if I approach the person, or persons with the right attitude and prayerfully confront them, a surprising thing happens: amazing truths come out of my mouth! Many times after a confrontation, I'm astounded at what I have said, and I realize that it was not me and my wisdom, but that of God. He brings things from His Word to my mind from a great sermon heard years ago. Or an illustration will pop up in my head that fits the situation perfectly, and I recall it like it happened the day before instead of in the 80's. This must be what the Bible refers to as being a vessel for God's use, and it is a gift and a blessing when it happens. God requests me do something that I hate and fear, and then uses it to bless me when I obey! 

Next post, another fear. In the meantime, I would appreciate prayers for strength and motivation. I am starting up an art studio, but I have several obstacles as I mentioned. My plan is to use the money made not only to help support my family, but to help further the Gospel. It is my heart's desire to use the creative gift God gave me to His Glory.

Full Steam Ahead!

Teapotjan

Assembly Line Teapots

Teapot after teapot after teapot rolls down the conveyor belt, each like the first and the one right after. One design, one plan, one mold for all the teapots sitting side by identical side on the shelf. All shiny, and clean, just like the teapot designer wanted. All the same. All the same. Maybe a different colored flower there, and a slight change of a leaf there, but pretty much the same. Ah, bliss! No aberration, no decisions, just a teapot like all others.

I must confess that if I received one of those teapots, I'd have to paint it or ding it or something to make it different. We thrive on individuality. God made each of us different so it must be part of His plan. He doesn't want His children to be "cookie cutter" Christians. He wants us to chose Him of our own, God-given, free will. And then serve Him with our unique, God-given talents.

Look at the world He created and the variety of His creations! I doubt that He expects us all to be the same and to worship Him the same way. I know I said that I would talk about how Christians should react to the unsaved today, but a few things have come up, and I feel this is a pressing matter. My heart is burdened over a schism among His children, and I want to do what I can to help close it.

Those of you that have read this blog know that I have left big "F" Fundamentalism behind me as part of my journey from guilt to grace. But I have not left Christ or His service. In fact, I feel closer to Him now than any other time in my life. I found that I don't have to be the same as all the other "good" Christians. I don't have to wear the same clothes, I don't have to use the same Bible translation, I don't have to listen to the same music, and I don't have to worship God exactly like anyone else does. 

Recently, a Christian university in the northern part of the US made the shift to allow worship style music in their chapels, camps and programs. Some of the dress standards have relaxed-not to the point of immodesty--just more casual. It's a move I applaud. There are no doctrinal compromises. There is no desire to become more worldly. It is a move to bring the the school into the present pushing aside outdated cultural preferences. Yet many pastors and many leaders in other more conservative schools have felt the need to speak out in disagreement with the change. 

Why? Will the cause of Christ suffer because a group of people who believe the same Bible and worship the same God changed their worship style? Will Christ be more glorified if we disagree publicly with others who claim His name and serve Him? Will "compromise" send the entire Christian population down a slippery slope into Hell? NO! It will not. God's love and salvation is bigger than all of our disagreements. He deals with individuals. He leads Christians differently, and we have no reason to doubt the leading of the Holy Spirit. And we would be committing blasphemy if we dare to dictate how the Holy Spirit works with anyone other than ourselves.

Will we do more damage to the cause of Christ by separating and criticizing each other over cultural differences? Yes. Most certainly. The only thing worth complete division is a corruption of the Gospel of Christ and the foundational doctrine behind it. That's really it. Seriously. Even then, we are dealing with people who are possibly unsaved, and any division should still be handled with care for their eternal soul. As for separating from those who criticize and and divide the body of Christ, they've already done that for us. But, I stil believe we should uphold them in prayer and let the Lord do His work with them.

We aren't going to be assembly line Christians. We shouldn't be assembly line Christians. God made us individuals and He gave us the Holy Spirit to guide us on how to use our individuality and talents to serve Him. We are handcrafted one of a kind works of art fashioned by our Creator.

Speaking of one of a kind, has anyone seen my cow teapot?