The Teapot's Wish List

We've hit Christmas time. It came quickly this year. November flew by as I was working on my master's class, doing early shopping, working, and planning for the holidays. It's that time when I ask, and am asked "What do you want? Do you have your wish list? No, really, what do you need?"

Well, I'm at a point in my life where I have a lot of things, too many actually. And the material things that I might want or need are related to home improvement or vehicle upgrades. In other words, stuff way too high priced for a typical wish list. So I usually mumble something like "iTunes gift card" or "candles" or "chocolate." I don't really want or need much of anything. I'd far rather give them something that makes their eyes light up, and their breath catch in their throats, and brings them absolute delight. That's a better gift than a million dollar gift card.

With all that said, I've been spending a little extra time in my van doing a few extra errands. For me, that means some deep thinking and intense prayer time. I can pray out loud, and if (read "when") I start to cry, I can pull over for a few minutes, and sob without freaking out my family. Last night was one of those times. I have my own personal battles to face, and last night I took time to ask God a few hard questions. And in the darkness of my van, as I drove to a place to stop for a few minutes, I heard a still, quiet voice ask "What do you want from Me? What do you wish for your life?"

I honestly was stunned that I had no good answer. I mean I have thought about what three wishes I would share should a genie ever pop out of a lamp. But what to ask of God? Peace? Happiness? Money? The outcomes I wanted to the hard questions that I asked? But all of that seemed selfish and they all fell short of a good wish list to give the Almighty. My mind raced around characters in the Bible, and what their answer would be. 

And then Solomon's answer came to mind. He asked for WISDOM. Not riches, or knowledge, or love, or material goods, but WISDOM. And God granted his request. Solomon became wise, and rich, and loved, and blessed and blessed and blessed. Asking for Godly wisdom was the ultimate wish. If he received money, he knew how best to use it. If he was asked to settle a problem, he had the best answer, and he knew how to handle the talents and resources God provided.


So my request of the Most High, Creator of All? Please Lord, grant me Godly wisdom. Show me how to treat those who cross my path and show them your light. Show me what to do with my money. Help my heart to stay tender to your leading. And help be wise enough to be at peace with your will. 

Merry Christmas!

Teapotjan

Picket Fences and Rainbows, Part Three

I enjoyed hearing from a few of you concerning things you believed made you a "good Christian." Some of your comments made me laugh, and others brought back some pretty strong and ugly memories. On the light side, many of you share my extreme dislike of hose and culottes. But one of the most hurtful things I heard concerned the treatment of women.

One reader wrote: "How about women are to be seen and not heard? Or women should never question a man in authority, pastor, husband, Sunday school teacher....ANY MAN for that matter! Obey and never ask why!!" In some families, this applied to any male in the family over the age of twelve! And in many, many churches, women could not prayer or read scripture if a male was in the audience. This puzzles me because God treats each of us as His children, and the Holy Spirit dwells in all of us.

Suffice it to say that many of the things we did in the name of being a good Christian really messed with our thought patterns and attitudes. A friend shared an article on Facebook this morning pointing out some of the common issues. Here's the link: The Sad Twisted Truth About Conservative Christianity's Effect on the Mind. And the promise that all will be well if we were "good kids" and "rejoiced always" and "praised the Lord anyway" fell through and hit the depths of our heart with a sickening and resounding thud.

We grew up. And some marriages failed. And some of our children turned away from God. And bad things happened. Not just a few bad things, and not just little things, but huge life-altering, OH GOD, WHY? things, one on top of another. And the picket fences broke and the paint peeled, and cancer, and sickness and death happened, and debts came, and the rainbows hid behind dark clouds or ended in the yard of some awful low life that didn't deserve the blessing like you did. Why? Why? Why?

And then, the Holy Spirit gently reminds us of the good things that actually do come from the source that all those long sermons and empty promises of our childhood claimed to use but messed up: God's Living Word. 

I Corinthians 4:7-12 (ESV). 

But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken;struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you.

Pleasing God has nothing to do with wearing hose, cutting hair, working ourselves silly, and going to church every Sunday. It has everything to do with His provision and grace. We suffer because we live in a sinful, imperfect world as sinful, imperfect people, where the effects of sin cause bad, imperfect terrible things to happen. But God, says that he fills these sinful, imperfect vessels or "jars of clay" with treasure. Showing that He gives us the good things, and that we can not earn them. It's just Him. That's all. Period. 

So, where are our picket fences and rainbows? In I Corinthians 4, we read in verses 16 through 18:

Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

Our picket fences and rainbows come on this earth in the smile of a friend, the warmth of a child's hug, and for me-chocolate. 
But our eternal "picket fences and rainbows" wait ahead in Heaven, where all our struggles and worries will seem as silly and transient as the tears of a toddler crying over a perceived injustice. 

We have just a short time here in this imperfect, sinful, temporary world. Our destination is perfect, timeless, and forever! What now seems so monumental and virtually unbearable (and it is as long as we are here) will dissipate. Glory is ahead. We shall see Him! We won't even need picket fences, and the rainbows will circle the throne of God! 

That's a wonderful promise, something to really hold on to take us through these awful times. Heaven is waiting! 

Looking ahead!

Teapotjan

Picket Fences and Rainbows, Part Two

As mentioned in the first part of "Picket Fences and Rainbows" I've been walking down some of the darker paths of my memories. There's been some sorting and categorizing, and a lot of pondering this week. I apparently touched a nerve with many, and I think I'll poke a few more this week.

Looking back at many of the things I thought I HAD to do in order to be a good Christian this week, I've been angry, guilty, sad, and giggly. Here's some of the things I recall, and I'd love to hear from you and some of your "had-tos." These are not universally from all fundamental churches and schools, but these are some of the things that I have heard or experienced in my fifty-three years.

1. House must be clean at all times in case company came over in order to not have a bad testimony. Yes, I heard this preached from a pulpit more than once.

2. Dresses, and skirts all of the time for us gals. If you were wearing pants around the house, and company came over, you changed while someone appropriately dressed answered the door.

3. Church attendance "every time the doors opened" unless you were dead, in the hospital, or dead. I have to confess that as a teen I found church very, very boring, but I went anyways because I had to.

4. Clothes that didn't "cup" any body part, even a little. I seriously heard one very embarrassed lady speaker say that we really shouldn't appear to have round breasts or hips. 

5. Don't question God's anointed, meaning only the pastor or evangelist or missionary that preached. And I have so many things that wished I had questioned back in those days.

6. At one point, no wire rim glasses for men because that's what "hippies like Jon Lennon wore."

7. From another preacher, around the same time, no big, plastic glass frames because of that "Elton" rock musician.

8. One terrible piece of women's clothing: hose. I personally believe that panty hose were invented by a very angry man who hated women and his lecherous brother who was secretly a "leg man."

9. No current secular music, at all. It should be at least a decade old, and then listen only if it fit the approved style, beat, words, etc.

10. God's anointed apparently required much nicer cars than a lay person because they drove so much. (This one really gets me, when I realize that many usually sent deacons, and junior pastors to do the visiting).

11. Door to door witnessing and visitation. I can't say that this was entirely bad, but saying that everyone should be ashamed if they didn't do this on a regular basis? What about family life?

12. Leading at least one soul to Christ a year, preferably one a month or more.

13. Remembering the exact date and time and place and outfit and every detail about when you were saved.

14. 1611 KING JAMES VERSION. I am still hearing preachers on the radio say that if you were not saved through the KJV, then you should question your salvation. I. AM. NOT. MAKING. THIS. UP. Pretty sad for all those non-english speaking folks, am I right?

15. And suits and ties for the men, the male equivalent of wearing hose. Every service, every visitation, every speaking engagement except at a Christian camp when jeans became temporarily acceptable.

16. Speaking of jeans--just no. Not for women-ever, and most men-unless they were needed at work. Denim was for work, and any time else-the Devil.

17. NO pre-recorded sound tracks for special music. They were worldly, and the beat was "the Devil's music."

18. Just one word: Culottes.

19. I would say that we were told to avoid gay people, but honestly I didn't know or hear much about them except from sermons about some awful place that they all apparently ran around naked having constant "illicit, unnatural relations and abominations."

20. Worldliness. We could never be "worldly." That included everything from using a current word like "groovy" (Handle it. I'm a child of the sixties.) to the styles that we wore. Example? Maxi skirts were banned at my high school because it was the current trend. 

I know some of my comments are rather tongue in cheek, but this list contains actual things from sermons, and rules I have heard, and followed all in the name of being a good Christian. These seem very shallow now, but I believed they were necessary back then. Thank God for growth, and wisdom and Grace.

Share some of yours, if you will. I'd love to see what we have in common. Next post, we'll do a little bit more traveling in the dark, and then come the rainbows!

Serve God. Love others.

Teapotjan

Picket Fences and Rainbows

Meeting up with friends recently threw me into a particularly nostalgic mood. As is the usual case with this mind God gave me, that brings up both good and bad memories.

I'm very thankful for long time friends. God uses our shared experiences to remind us of His faithfulness during the difficult times, and His provision during the lean times. Sweet fellowship, tears, shared blessings and burdens renew our spirits for the journey ahead, and remind us of our purpose to serve Christ. These memories, precious and rare, are gifts.

And then, when the warmth of that sweet fellowship begins to fade, my mind (bless its heart) goes meandering down some of the darker paths in my past. But I've learned that those darker memories sometimes can also be a blessing in a different way.

Growing up in a very fundamental background, I followed the rules. I was the good girl. The example. The one church leaders pointed to and said "Ask her to help, she'll be glad to do whatever."

And they were right. I was dependable, hard-working, smart, and willing. I kept the nursery. I taught Sunday School. I sang solos when asked. I dressed modestly (no pants and always hose). I acted appropriately. Blushed accordingly, and I obeyed my parents, and respected my elders. My dad was a deacon, and church pianist. My mom taught Sunday school, and spoke in ladies's fellowship groups. In other words, we were a very good, church-going family. Indeed, we had two churches get their start in our living room.

I was saved at an early age. I am sure of that. God gave me assurance early and that has never been much of a personal struggle. My struggles come from a misperception rooted early in my life. The misperception that if I were the "good, go-to, I'll get right on that and work myself to death girl" that everything in life would turn out correctly. My spouse would be the love of my life. My children would be perfect and serve the Lord, and life will be easy-peasy, white picket fences, and rainbows.

All those high school chapel sermons said as much. If we did as we were told, and the guys grew to lead their homes, and the gals learned to submit to the guys, then God would bless us with sweet, obedient children and a Heaven on earth existence. Those families with problems like divorce, and drinking, and wayward children? They blew it badly somewhere, strayed and God had withdrawn His blessing. And we all knew that was pretty much the end of the world. One terrible thing, and that was it. Wasting away in the sea of sin until finally rescued by death or The Rapture, just barely saved by the skin of their teeth.

So, I went to weekend camps, threw my stick in the fire, and wept and prayed. I was always going to the altar at church to confess yet another weakness. And frankly, I felt being a Christian was really, really hard. Nevertheless, I continued on to attend a Christian University, and the teaching there was a little deeper, but the main point was the same. Do right, and life will be good. I followed the path set before me. Broke up with the guy that my parents didn't like, and married the guy that they did like. What in the world could go wrong?

In the next post, I'll continue down some of the dark paths of my memory, but not to worry, there are a few rainbows ahead.

Looking back to learn how to go forward,
Teapotjan

Treasured Teapots and Filthy Rags

Looking back on some of the attitudes and teaching from my fundamental past, one in particular keeps popping up in my thoughts lately. I sat through many sermons about the sinful nature of the human race and a Christian's own futile attempt to be anything but a filthy rag. I and the others in the congregation were call "vile," "wretched," "putrid," and "useless."  This often threw me into a fit of guilt and hopelessness, especially when I battled depression. Isaiah 64:6 was the usual text for this teaching: 

But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousness is as filthy rags;and we do all fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.

Please don't mistake what I am saying as heresy. Every human carries the burden of sin. All of us. Every. Single. One. From Adam to the newest child born seconds ago, not one of us can meet the requirements of perfection demanded by a Holy and Righteous Creator. We must look to Christ and His sacrifice to cover our sins and pay that debt. If you are reading this and don't understand what I'm saying, contact me and I'll be more than happy to explain.

But the consideration of that sacrifice started me thinking. Why would an omnipotent God make such a tremendous sacrifice for a bunch of throw away filthy, putrid, wretched, vile, useless beings? Then, I thought about the loveliness of my own children and how (on most days) it was hard to see them as "wretched.
I would do anything for these fellow sinners, and I am a mortal, imperfect human with a limited ability to love. How much more can God feel and do?
As I have often done in this journey, I turned to Scripture, and studied for myself, no longer dependent on man's interpretation, and I realized that the filthy rags mentioned in Isaiah do not refer to me, but to my feeble attempts to live up to His standards. If we attempt to do so, we fail miserably, and those attempts dry up and blow away like the leaves mentioned in Isaiah.

And another question popped up. If God sees our works as filthy rags, why do we even bother doing them? Back to Scripture:

Psalm 149:4

For the Lord takes pleasure in His people; he adorns the humble with salvation.

Also, as Genesis gives the account of Creation, we find that we were made in His image, and that He called His creation "good." The advent of sin did not diminish His pleasure in his creation. We are His jewels, His treasure, His delight, and He actively pursues ALL of us to join in fellowship with Him. It occurred me to at this point, that ALL of us must actively choose to either accept or to not accept His plan for eternal fellowship. And when we do accept this gift, and give Him praise, He receives pleasure and honor and love. He delights in our worship and works in His name.

Treasured, and protected by God. Loved in spite of failings. Sought after by the Most High. I will praise Him and He will be delighted!

Teapotjan

Serve God, Love others.