Teapot's Resolution

The Place I Should Stand

Janet Lindsey O'Brien

Grasping an arm. 

Clutching a hand. 

But still being pulled from the place I should stand. 

Being pushed by the longings that tear at my heart,

and the knowledge that leaving could be a new start. 

I want that life. 

I want to be me. 

No voice to say "wait."

I want to be free. 

To live in the now, and learn from before, and look to tomorrow with promise of more. 

But…

The arm leads to shoulder, 

The hand wears a band. 

The voice calls "I love you" from the place I should stand. 

Promises made. Promises kept. 

The shoulder is wet, 

with the tears I have wept. 

I'll stay in the place I promised to be. 

But that pulling and pushing shook something big free. 

I'll stay in this place, but I can't be the same. 

There'll be no more waiting. 

I won't play that game. 

I want the support of that arm, hand and voice. 

But if it's not there, I chosen my choice. 

I'll act on my own while I stand in my place, 

And I'll fight to be me and set my own pace. 

Squeezing an arm. 

Holding a hand. 

Still staying put in the place I should stand. 

I can be me, and he can be he. 

And my pushing and pulling brings that new start to me!

With love,

Teapotjan